“Tina,” a petite woman in her early 60s, is community college counselor. Tina wanted to feel more confident speaking Spanish. She told me that, from birth, she grew up hearing Spanish. She was very close with both of her grandmothers who only spoke Spanish with her. When Tina was less than two years old, her parents decided they would only speak English with her. They thought it would make life easier for her in Los Angeles if they stopped speaking Spanish to her.
Even though Tina had taken lots of Spanish classes in school, and had counseling on her Spanish language issues, she still felt as though there was something blocking her from speaking more fluent Spanish.
I decided to use Lindsay Kinney’s Ultimate Truth Statement (UTS) process, in which I had Tina come up with a concise statement in the present tense describing how she would feel when she reached her goal. Her Ultimate Truth Statement was, “I feel empowered and confident when I speak the language of my heart and soul.”, The rating system for the UTS process is a complete reversal from EFT. 0 represents-“no way in hell” and 10 equals “yes!” Tina rated her UTS at a “5.”
We then looked for whatever was in the way of her experiencing her Ultimate Truth Statement. She shared with me stories about her Uncle Jorge, who was like Archie Bunker. He teased Tina unmercifully from birth until she was in college. Whenever she spoke in Spanish, he would make fun of her. He tried to convince her that she was adopted. I asked her to imagine her life with her uncle as a TV sitcom, and to come up with a title that would make her laugh. The title was, “El Cabronsito con dos Lenguas”—just coming up with the title made her crack up and we decided to use this for a reminder phrase.
We went back to her Ultimate Truth Statement, because I felt she had shifted her energy. It went from a 5 to a 7, and we hadn’t tapped yet. So, she was already feeling stronger about her positive phrase.
Then I had her focus on her Uncle Jorge. I asked her to think about why he would have picked on her. She related that he was a very short man, and he had probably been picked on himself. When I asked what the intensity (EFT rating) felt like for how he had treated her, it was only a two. She had begun to feel compassion for him. I had her tap, and while tapping I included phrases for psychological reversals that included how weird EFT was; how there was a part of her that wasn’t quite ready to give up her story; and forgiving that part of her that “believed” her Uncle Jorge for all of those years. I also included Dr. Carrington’s method of arguing with herself: “I choose to let this go; no, I don’t; yes, I do.”
After two rounds of tapping and I asked Tina what the intensity level when she thought about her uncle. It had dropped almost to a zero. There was a tiny bit of resistance left, and she asked, “Can I really do it?” I asked where the resistance was and she said in her throat. Softly, I asked, “If the resistance in your throat could speak, what would it say?” She replied, “I’m afraid to make mistakes.”
We went back to her Ultimate Truth Statement, and I asked her to read it and rate it. Though it was now a 9.8, she still felt a tiny bit of resistance.
Then I asked who in her childhood would have pointed out her mistakes. She immediately replied, “Uncle Jorge’s wife, “Maria,” as she raised up her shoulders. Aunt Maria made fun of everyone in her family, and Tina was terrified of her. She was afraid to speak Spanish in front of her aunt, because she didn’t want her bad-mouth her. I asked about the intensity of the fear and tension that she was feeling when she thought of her aunt. It was between a three and four. We did two rounds of tapping on the fear she felt about her aunt, and how Tina had still been carrying around her aunt and uncle’s voices in her head, even though they were long dead. The intensity dropped to a zero and the whole thing felt humorous to her.
I asked her to read her Ultimate Truth Statement, and to tell me what the intensity was now. It was a 10. I then asked her to write and say it in Spanish, which she did with confident joy. She shared that she felt that something major had shifted within herself about her Spanish issue. She wasn’t feeling afraid of making a mistake anymore.
