A woman called me this morning, her voice sounding vaguely familiar. It turns out that I had worked with “Martha,” a middle-aged woman with diabetes, about pain she was having with her hip replacement. It had been over three months since we did that phone session. Martha explained that I had helped her to clear her "mother issues" in the span of a single one-hour session. She told me that she had spent years working with a number of therapists trying to release her "charge" around her mother, and that I was the one who had finally been able to help her.
As a very empathetic woman, Martha took on pain from the people around her. I asked her, “Who was a thorn in your butt?”
She immediately blurted out, “My mother!”
Knowing that the left side of the body represents the feminine, I found it interesting that Martha carried more pain there. As many of you know, the first female relationship in most of our lives is almost always with our mother. Martha believed that all of her problems stemmed from her mother, a perfectionist who wanted Martha to be petite. As a child, Martha did not feel emotionally supported or accepted by her mother. Martha rebelled against her mother’s plans for her, and had become a large woman. Martha felt her mother’s mantra was, “Let's make Martha feel like sh*t.”
As we talked about how her mother had treated her, Martha's felt upset in her stomach. The anxiety and tenseness that she felt was at a 9-10 out of 10. She said she felt like she wanted to puke.
I asked Martha to recall an early traumatic event with her mother. She remembered something that happened when she was four or five years old. We did several rounds of tapping on that particular event and how Martha felt right in that moment about what her mother had said.
My style is to try to find the humor in the situation. One of the reminder phrases was, “Mom is a thorn in my butt.” It worked = Martha cracked up! When she thought back to what her mother had done it became laughable, and the intensity dropped to between one and two. After two more rounds of tapping the intensity totally disappeared. When Martha thought about what her mother had done 50 years ago, the charge was gone! Her stomach no longer felt upset, anxious or tense. Even the pain in the left side of her body had disappeared.
Martha had called to let me know that her mother issue was really healed. She was still amazed that the work we had done over three months ago was still holding for her. She wanted to make an appointment for the next big issue in her life – she now wants to clear her beliefs, stories and emotional charges related to traumatic events that have resulted in her pushing men away. To prepare for the session, I told her to list negative events that are related to her not having a man in her life, and to be sure to go back as far she can remember.
I'm looking forward to working with Martha and clearing whatever is in the way of her allowing a man into her life!
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